Pre-shift?!? Put up a list and save everyone's time (you're not that important)

I was totally unaware of these droll little daily occurances they call "pre-

shift", until I started working in the fantasy world of a corporate restaurant. Sometimes it's hard to figure out just what the purpose of these twice daily time-wasters is...... informational.....okay.....pep talk?.....gimme a freaking break! We're servers...not the high school football team! Or is this the day that corporate pulled managements strings a little tighter and they're going to browbeat us into getting the "performance scopes" mentioned last week. Or are we going to have another stupid contest....like seeing who can sell the most wine flights? Corporate wants us to push these wine flights! Why! What difference does it make if we sell (actually, if the customer orders) a wine flight or a glass of wine? They're the same price! Besides that....it's bad enough (particularly when you're busy) that you have to stop and polish every wine glass...who wants to sell a table a bunch of wine flights and polish three times as many glasses?!? I mean really, common sense should prevail...but not at pre-shift. Heres' one of my favorites...."Don't break the dishes, they cost money." No shit! Seriously, one manager actully said this! Apparently we had never considered this concept.



I started to think of pre-shift as nothing more then the "Mangerial Self-Important Soapbox Lecture Series." Really now....if you want us to pay attetion, stick to the pertinent info....what's the soup of the day....what are the specials...and that pretty much covers it. We are not poking each other....rolling our eyes back....or making comments to each other because we are the immature little idiots you seem to think us to be......it's quite the opposite....we are simply amusing ourselves through a situation which is just too ridiculous to be true. This is when (if I haven't done it already) I frantically look over my left shoulder, jump up!...and run to the imaginary emergency at my table. ( I already know they need nothing). This is especially fun when I have no tables.