If you don't know how to order...well...you're just a moron

Millions of people eat out everyday...and as a rule...most of them know how to order their meals...but as with every rule...there are exceptions. When we ask, "Would you like to start out with an appetizer?"...that's pretty much all we are talking about. No, no one wants any appetizers. ....then the aforementioned moron pipes in with, "I'll have a salad." so you poliltely ask if they would like to order their meals now...."No, I just want a salad now." No one else is ready to order anything...but this thick-headed knuckle dragger (THKD) is bound and determined to upset not only the ordering process...but also the order of the universe. WE DO THINGS IN A CERTAIN SEQUENCE......

Number 1. You order your entrees and salads at the same time.

Number 2. There is timing involved here...so your meal won't take too long and you won't have to complain about how long it's taking...because we know you are going to, and I'm pretty sure that you're going to prove not only that you lack social skills...but you also have no comprehension of how to tell time. So we get you your damn salad....the rest of the table has nothing....(this is lost on you)...it takes you about 9.7 seconds to finish it off with your sub-standard eating skills and poor table manners....(you probably wonder why you don't get too many invitations to eat out)...everyone else is now ready to order...your pronounciation of the dinner you want is so bad...I have to ask you to point to the menu....ahh....(more than 2 syllables...that explains it)...so now we get the soup and salad for the rest of the people at your table...and then we ring in the order...that's pretty standard timing for just about any restaurant....as everyone is trying to enjoy their soup or salad....THKD flags you down and loudly announces to the world..."I'm really hungry, you can go ahead and bring out my food now, after all ...how long can it take?" You know that no amount of logic will be an acceptable explanation of why you can't bring his food out (which just got ordered 5 minutes ago) now, so you simply say.."okay" and walk into the kitchen to swap stories with your fellow servers about whose got the biggest moron at their table tonight.