Is it Friday again, already?!?

I love Friday’s! Always have. It goes all the way back to school…as soon as that last bell rang on Friday afternoon it was freedom time….everything is always good on a Friday….it’s the start of the weekend….no alarm clock the next day…..


After I got out of school and started working in restaurants….Friday became the fun night….the money night….time to get revved up…..and a few decades later, I still feel that way!

The restaurant will be at full staff tonight…get to see more of my co-worker friends…..the regular Friday crowd will filter in…..the “Cheers” theme song keeps running through my mind…..”Making your way in the world today takes everything you’ve got…Taking a break from all your worries should would mean a lot…” So take that break, sit back, take a deep breath, allow yourself to relax…..it’s Friday! Everything is always good on a Friday….let it be that way…..

I’ve got a lot of stuff to get done today…but it’s Friday….and everything just feels like more fun. Weird? Maybe, but it works for me.

So now I’m off to start my Friday adventures…looking forward to getting a lot done and then going to work …gonna rock and roll tonight. Sure, I know there are a lot of people saying it’s just a state of mind, but then, what isn’t?

Don't ya just love it when......

There are times when customers say things, (for which you may have a snappy response) and you know they are just not paying attention to anything outside a six inch perimeter of their being……


Ya gotta love it when someone orders a cup of coffee, lets it sit for 15 minutes, and then informs you in their best Queen of England manner, “My coffee is cold” and the fact that hot liquids, when left to sit for a period for time, will eventually cool down to room temperature, is completely lost on them. I used to apologize and say, “Oh, I’m sorry, let me get you another one.” Now I just say “Oh” and pick up the cup.

Because bread is an item that is baked continually throughout the shift, there will be times when it is not available at the exact time you are bringing salads to the table, so you inform everyone, as you are serving the salads, that “Bread is in the oven and will be ready in about 2 to 3 minutes.” As you are walking away from the table someone will stop you and ask, “Do we get bread?” There are multiple answers to this question, many of which are not appropriate to say out loud.

And then there’s the soup issue…..before the ordering process even starts, you loudly (because you know some are hard of hearing and others will prove themselves to be lacking in attention) announce to the table what the soups are for the day. One will say, “I’m sorry, what were the soups, again?” So you repeat yourself. Another will ask “What are my soup choices?” (Okay, so that’s 3 times you’ve told them) And then yet another will ask, “Do you have any soup today?” Did I mention they were all sitting next to each other?

It makes you wonder how these people ever made it through school.

 

Random ramblings........

Sometimes I love the mid-week doldrums…..let’s you regain your energy for what’s to come on the weekend ahead…..you just can’t run at full tilt boogie every day.

If you tell me your table is ready to order…..and everyone says, “You go first, I’ll have decided by the time you get to me”……then your table is not ready to order….don’t expect me to stand there….

An unexpected laugh for the day: When you come around a corner to see one of your fellow servers using tray jacks as stilts….

Many old buildings oftentimes have ghost stories attached to them…but when tongs used for bread, fly across the kitchen of their own accord…twice….it makes you stop and ponder….this is not behavior normally associated with tongs….

Little unexpected pleasures in life: It’s Saturday morning and you’d rather be drinking coffee at home, curled up in your sweats, nice and toasty….but instead you’re setting up for a banquet…and then someone arrives with a bag of cinnamon rolls…..and suddenly it’s coffee hour with friends…..nice…..

Live music can add such merriment to the night…..like when the entire lounge starts singing along to “Sweet Caroline”……and the less inhibited get up and dance next to their table….and you find yourself doing a chorus line kick to “New York, New York”……

Let's play musical rooms.....

I was scheduled to work a memorial luncheon yesterday, so my fellow server, with whom I was working, and I decided to arrive a little early to make sure everything was set up for success. We crossed every “t” and dotted every “I”. We wanted to be sure that this would go as smoothly as it could possible go. The tables were set, creamers and butter were out, the water was poured, carafes of water were on each table, the coffee was ready, as were the thermal coffee pots we could set on the tables, the buffet was ready, the bread baskets were ready, our wait station was stocked to the max with ice, iced tea, lemonade, soft drinks, glasses, you name it, we had it ready…for 30 to 40 people.


At the last minute we get a call that there will be 50 to 60 people. That’s cool. The room right next to it was pretty much set up also, so we figure we can put the overflow in there. We figured wrong. They started complaining that they all wall wanted to be in one room. That would have been entirely possible if we had known ahead of time how many people there was going to be.

If you’ve never worked in a restaurant, then you have no idea the amount of prep work that goes into setting up a group event. And, because you don’t know, you don’t care.

As I’m walking back from the bar with a couple of drinks, I’m met by an onslaught of people moving to the main dining room. Great! I knew what table these drinks went to, when they were seated in the room we had prepared, now I have no idea where these people are.

Did I mention that the chafing dishes already had hot pans of food in them? Not easy to move chafing dishes with hot food in the top pan and steaming water in the bottom pan.

An hour and a half of prep time, was all for nothing.

What a weekend........

Between Friday and Saturday I worked a total of 24 hours. There was the dream shifts, and there was the shift from hell.


I was enjoying a leisurely Friday morning….relaxing with a pot of coffee…..getting my day in order…..and then the phone rang. It was the owner asking me if the server who was scheduled for Friday morning said anything the night before, about not coming in. No, she didn’t say anything to anyone. Well, she didn’t show, and she didn’t call. Ten minutes later I got another call asking if I could come in. So much for my relaxing morning…..now it was hop to, in double time….hit the shower….did a hair spray sculpture and I was off and running…..pulled into the parking lot, quite a few cars, and I knew as soon as I hit the door it was show time.

The owner was waiting on two tables, and a table of 10 was starting to trickle in….then a few more tables, then a few more. I was the only server there, the owner switched over to playing busboy. But it all worked out, went smooth, and before I knew it was 4:00 p.m. time for a break.

I grabbed another cup or coffee and went and sat on the patio……ten minutes later…”You’ve got another table!” Oh shit. I got their drink order…and then the first member of the evening crew showed up, so I turned it over to him. But now, I had to set up the bar for the night…..So much for a break.

The one who neglected to show up for the lunch shift was also missing in action for the night shift. Okay, we’re down one server…..another, who was supposed to work the wedding reception that was taking place that evening, called off. Now we’re down two. Welcome to the evening from hell. It was the 2nd day for the new guy, we threw him to the wolves, but he’s an old professional and handled it all in stride. The new girl was thrown on the wedding reception, had no real experience and was pretty much useless.

I asked who was working the lounge, where the bar and the singer and ten tables are located and they said “You are.” WTF!?!?! So of course this is the night we get extremely busy. The owner, his girlfriend and the manager were scrambling around helping out any way they could. We were stretched beyond the max. We all powered through it....not every cusotmer was happy, the numbers were against us.  But when the dust settled, we all knew we did the best we could.

As for the one who called off on purpose, supposedly to prove a point…..call yourself anything you want, but don’t ever call yourself a professional.

I remember when....we all wore skirts.....

Way back in the 7th decade of the previous century, when I first started working in restaurants, there were a few things that were different…..


We were called waitresses. There were very few waiters, actually none, at any of the restaurants I worked at. And…..we wore skirts. At some jobs we wore very short skirts. But I was 19 and had great legs. Short skirts were nothing new to me, I wore them all through high school. One waitress and I had a sort of an unspoken contest going on to see who could wear the shortest skirt. I finally told her, “I’m 5’8” and you’re 5’1”, you’re not gonna win this contest.”

Oh my God! The shoes we wore! Think about it….we had on skirts, you couldn’t run around in clunky waitress shoes, you had to have shoes that looked good….or so we thought. We wore shoes that had heels or wedges or even (because it was popular at that time) platforms.

Even after we had made the transition to slacks…..we were young and allowed vanity to get the best of us, and we still wore stupid shoes. No wonder my knees are shot!

But alas, now I am firmly entrenched in the realm of thick soled, non-slip sensible shoes. When I see a group of high school kids come in all dressed up for the big dance, the girls hobbling around (because they haven’t learned to walk in them yet) 3 and 4 inch heels…..my knees start to hurt and my ankles want to buckle…and I am waiting for one of them to fall off of their shoes…..and then I glance down at my feet and remember that I am solidly planted on the ground. Thank God for sensible shoes!

When calling off a shift......

There is a vast difference between calling off a shift at a privately owned restaurant, and calling off a shift at a corporate restaurant. Take yesterday as an example…..


Normally there are two servers on at lunch, there are very few lunch shifts where we are really busy. (We’re in Michigan, and the economy still sucks.) So if one person calls off, for whatever reason, and you do the math, there goes 50 % of the wait staff. The owner tried calling someone in, but it was to no avail.

When I got to work yesterday morning, the owner had already started to do the morning set up work, he had the ice bins filled, the coffee was on, and the small banquet room that was going to be used was mostly set up. No need to panic, we’ll just power through it, if we have to.

When the food was ready for the group upstairs, (there were 11) obviously you need more than one tray to carry all this food, so the chef helped out and carried up a tray, saving me a trip. See, teamwork, you just get the job done.

Meanwhile…..the owner was helping with the customers that came in for the regular dining room…he was pouring water, getting bread, clearing plates, resetting tables…again, it’s the teamwork thing……

Now, at a corporate restaurant we get an entirely different scenario….if there are ten servers on and one calls off, you only lose 10% of your staff. The other 90% can easily pick up the slack. But, the manager, will run around like Chicken Little crying “The sky is falling! The sky is falling!” Heaven forbid they should have to pick up a dirty plate or carry a tray! (This only happens under the most extreme of circumstances, and you can be sure the entire staff will hear about it. How dare they have to suffer the indignity of doing something so beneath them as to carry a tray!) So rather than just knuckle under and help out, they will spend a quarter of their time desperately trying to bully someone into coming in, and the other 75% percent of their time bitching about it.

When you're the only one on the floor.....

I found out last night that I will be the only on the floor at lunch today. Since lunch is never a huge money making shift, we dream of this…..and then you find out that there will be a table of 10.….cool….oh wait! They’ll be upstairs in one of the smaller banquet rooms. That changes things……it makes a big difference….if everyone is in the same room, you consolidate your steps….if you have a few smaller tables, you can work it as one giant table…….bring out salads for more than one table at a time….set your tray down in a central location…work from there….you can always see what going on….but every trip up and down the stairs will feel like you’re going over the river and through the woods….. And then your imagination starts running wild….what if this is the really busy day….after all, in the world of Murphy’s Law, this is a very real possibility.


There is only so much you can do to get set up and make everything as convenient as possible. There is nothing you can do about the customer who chooses this day to play 20 questions and drag out the ordering process a long a s possible….your imagination starts running wild….what else can happen…..what if 6 or 7 tables come in at once, plus you have 10 upstairs….everyone will want separate checks…..wanna rewrite the menu…..they’ll all be in a hurry…..

Aha! The possibility exists that someone may get called in to work. It will feel like the cavalry has arrived! Yes! There is probably a 2 percent chance that someone will answer their phone this morning!

Roll on imagination……roll on……

Tables you want to avoid.....

Every now and then you are going to get some tables that you not only want to avoid, but eventually it becomes necessary that you DO avoid these tables.


I had a table of two sweet little old ladies the other night…..they told me how they hadn’t been out to eat together in a really long, so I can only imagine how much they had to talk about. That’s fine….take your time….enjoy your chat…..however, they seemed to want to include me in the chat.

I started out by asking them if they would like a glass of wine….yes, one ordered wine….but the didn’t want wine because she had a scratchy throat and a cough, and then wanted to explain about how long she had had the cough, what she thought had caused her current condition, what she thought she should do about it….etc….etc…..etc….. I finally had to cut in and tell her she needed tea, with whiskey and honey. She thought that was a splendid idea……whew…..that gave me an escape route. But, I had to bring the drinks back to the table….which opened up another conversation I did not have the time to participate in. So, how to avoid the table without seeming rude, next time you have o go back there, have items on your tray for more than one table, drop their stuff off first, and if they try getting long winded again, just look at your tray and tell them you have to go drop this off at another table…then take the long way around so you don’t have to pass by their table too closely.

Don’t be upset, this isn’t rude, ignoring all your other customers would be rude….this is simply a matter of time conservation.

Unexpected slammin' Sunday.......

Holy guacamole! What a Sunday!


We usually meander through Sunday’s. Between two o’clock and five o’clock, there’s usually very little, if any activity. But not yesterday, they just kept coming in. Of course there was one of those Murphy’s Law things going on, we were short a server.

One server who started at 3:00, came in with 15 chilidogs and a gallon of root beer for all of us. They were from a little place that’s makes their own root beer. Really good stuff.. On a typical Sunday, we would have had time to eat, chat, check the reservations, get ourselves acclimated for the evening. But not yesterday! If you wanted to eat a chilidog, you had to do it on the fly. And I mean on the fly….it doesn’t look good to take a bite of something, and then walk out on the floor chewing food.

It seemed like every time I turned around, all I heard was “You’ve got another table.” Then I got a group of 11 and a group of 6, simultaneously! Wtf ! Plus what you’ve already got going, and they just kept coming in….. This was not a good day for one of the servers to have a massive hangover …. But she powered through it.

We were all in hyper mode, we had to be, there was no choice. But when you work with top notch people, everyone there is pushed to the limit, you help each other out, it’s amazing what can get done!

Oh sure, you’re always gonna get the guy who has to find something to complain about….. (I got him)….. He made some sarcastic comments about the amount of time it was taking for the food…..but you can’t take the bait, just go TOTALLY professional on him, and if his comments bother you, never let it show. (Actually, I think the others at the table were a little embarrassed by his behavior.)

At the end of the night, when all is said and done, it’s a really good feeling to know you just rocked it out and kicked ass!

When eating at the bar.....

An excerpt from the book……The Ordering Ritual…..



Many of the regular customers know that statements like “We’re ready to order now!” will be met with a response not heard in most restaurants, such as “Good for you” as I keep walking to the other end of the bar. Or, “I don’t see a cast on that arm, write it down yourself. And remember, spelling counts. If you are going to use abbreviations, make sure that are restaurant approved. If I can’t understand it, you won’t get it.”

Or, there’s always the ever-so-popular line, “We’ve decided!”

“Okay, it’s about time. You’ve been studying the menu to so long you should have imprints of it on your corneas, the kitchen is ready to close, and we’re out of most of the specials. Maybe you should go take a remedial reading course so you can speed up this process. Either that, or I can give you the picture menu next time.”

Then there was the guy (who was a very regular patron) who misread the description of a particular chicken dish that was on the special card one evening. When his food arrived, he ranted and raved that that was NOT what he had ordered! I showed him the card again, but he was on a roll and not ready to admit he screwed up. He said he would eat it anyway. Like he had any choice in that! It was either eat it or wear it, in which case he could receive the nutrients through osmosis, as it seeped in through his skin. I, personally, would find eating it more enjoyable.

The next day, before ordering dinner, he did acquiesce that he had misread the special card the night before. He was quite sheepish about ordering his food for the evening. I asked him if he was SURE he knew what he was ordering. He quietly replied, “Yes, I’m sure. I read the menu thoroughly.”

“GOOD! Because if you complain tonight I’m going to serve it to you suppository style!”

Some tips for putting on a golf outing......

Now, I realize this may be a little out of season, but it’s what was on my mind, so I don’t care, I just wanted to give you pointers if you’re planning on putting together a golf outing for your bar crowd.


First of all, you have to realize exactly what it is you’re doing. You’re putting on a golf outing, (pause), for a bar.

You’re going to have many types of golfers……The one’s who may or may not drink on the golf course, but they’ll certainly have a drink when they’re done…..

And then there’s then one’s who like to a couple of beers on the course, hey, why not?

We mustn’t leave out the one’s who bring a cooler along…..always hoping it will fit into the basket, but invariably have to set down by their feet…..it’s annoying…..

But there’s always the guy who’s gotta go the distance…he’s gotta show the world that he loves drinking AND golf. (He’s got to show everyone that drinking is not the only thing he does.) His cooler has a trailer hitch on it and he’s hooked it up to the back of the golf cart.

These people would never know each other if they didn’t like drinking and all happen to do it at the same place.

The bottom line is, everyone wants to play in a fun outing…..nobody wants to help you put this together, they just wanna have fun…..so that puts you in good position……you are in control, you decide all the rules, you pick the golf course, you decide the price, you get to decide what to do about food, how much the prize money is….everything you say goes, just don’t ask them to help…..you rule….take advantage of it…….oh, and you golf for free.

An interesting point to ponder....

  Two women came in on Sunday afternoon to check the place out, and sample a couple of entrée salads for a baby shower they were planning. They decided to sit at the bar. It’s very rare when anyone sits at the bar on Sunday, so I don’t bartend on Sunday, I work the floor. But it was the middle of the day and pretty slow, so I had a chance to chat with them. They were wondering where I had worked before, so I told them I had worked at a corporate restaurant for a couple of years, and prior to that I was the bartender at a place a few miles down the road for 25 years. One women looked at me and said, “Wow, either you really like the restaurant industry, or you’ve had one miserable existence all these years.”


No one has ever actually said anything like that to me before…..so I had to stop and ponder for a moment……(as I was smiling to myself)……she’s either got a really bad misconception of the restaurant industry from hearing too many horror stories, or she was a server in a previous life, wasn’t cut out for it and therefore it was a terrible experience. I mean “miserable existence” is pretty powerful language.

So how do you explain to someone that you’ve actually had more fun than most going to work all those years, without it sounding sugar coated? After all, she seemed to have some strong notions that this is an undesirable way to live.

I gave her the Readers Digest version of how I had my own business for 7 years servicing the real estate industry, and between real estate taking a dive and the internet, I was put out of business and lost everything. Hopefully now, she has a better understanding that there are worse things in life than working in restaurants.

It's a good time when........

Back to Saturday….after THE big game……


As soon as THE big game ended Saturday evening, it was if the flood gates opened up, everyone left their cocoon of a television room and ventured out into the world. Some still wearing their various football regalia. Around here, it’s a pretty even split of who is for Michigan, and who is for Michigan State. So we saw people in their green and white Michigan State shirts, and people in their maize and blue Michigan shirts. So after a mediocre start to Saturday night, all of a sudden we were in full swing. The dining room filled up, the bar filled up and the lounge was full. The singer was singing and no longer had to compete with the noise from those watching the game. Of course there was still talk of who won the game, or who should have won the game (in the minds of those whose team had lost.)

The bar was filled with friends of mine, friends of the singer, and those who came up to the bar when the wedding reception they were at downstairs was over.

Then something unexpected happened and the crowd all became one. Ah, the power of music and a few cocktails…..the singer started singing Neil Diamond’s “Sweet Caroline.” Up until this point it was unbeknownst to me what a great sing-a-long song this was. The funny part is, they were all singing a part that had no words….the singer would get to the words, “Sweeeeeet Caroliiiiiiine…..” and the crowd followed with “Da da daaaaa,” with much hand clapping and bar slapping to accompany this….pretty soon the whole lounge was singing along……

What football game?

When football rules......

It’s fall…..the leaves are turning…..the weather gets a little crisp and cool…..and football rules. It’s just a fact of life.


We had a few events scheduled at the restaurant on Saturday, and it’s a given that college football will be going on all day, all evening. So it becomes imperative that the men at these gatherings know where the television is .

The first event was a baby shower. Now, why men and boys are even at a baby shower is beyond me, but that was their cross to bear. One guy asked me where the nearest television was, (or do we have one that could be brought downstairs to the room they were in. Yeah, that would have gone over well) so I told him to follow me, and I’d show him where the television was located. As we started walking, I said it was over the river and through the woods…..as we journeyed down a hall, through another banquet room, up the stairs, around the corner to the bar, and there it was! Shining like a lighthouse beacon in the night. (He wanted to catch the Ohio State game) I also showed him another route that involved a different staircase and a the dining room he would have to go through, but now at least he had two escape routes.

The other men who were stuck there wanted to leave in time to catch THE big game in the state that afternoon, Michigan vs. Michigan State. This game was due to start at 3:30. At 2:00, the grandpa at the baby shower asked me how long before they needed to be out of the room, as they knew we had to set up for another party that evening. I really think he was hoping I would tell them they had to leave now. I said “You’ve got about an hour.” He quickly announced to everyone that they had to start clearing out now, because we needed to reset the room. He was a man on a mission. (lol)

There was also a wedding reception early in the evening. There was a group of men who kept running upstairs to check on THE big game, alliances between Michigan and Michigan State were equally split .

I asked a couple of them, “Aren’t they serving dinner now?”

“Yeah, we had a salad so far, they’re serving the next course, we’ll just catch whatever course we can.” They never took their eyes off the screen while telling me this.

What did we learn from this? No matter what the event, ya just can’t mess with THE big game. And so it’s always been, and so it always will be. Hey, kept my bar busy, I’m not complaining.

In anticiation of Friday night.....

Ahhhh….. Friday night…..you get to work….check out the reservation book…..make sure everything you need is in order and all stocked up……get your best game face on….. bull shit with your fellow workers……get your styrofoam cup ready with your beverage of choice, (iced tea, water , coke, whatever) write your name on the cup, some figure out who they are going to borrow a wine key from…..actually, at one point in time, I got tired of losing my wine key by loaning it out, and never getting it back, that I started asking for collateral before loaning it out. “Sure, you can borrow my wine key, give me your keys or your phone.” It worked, I never lost one again.


A few early tables trickle in….and then it’s like being a the starting gate of the Kentucky Derby, all of a sudden….”They’re off!”

Things are going smooth….everyone is in sync…..it’s the server ballet….all the finely tuned machines are running smooth, except for a couple of servers who don’t know the ballet, and most likely never will. They’ll be trying to tap dance and shuffle around the rest, eventually stepping on their own feet…..the ballet dancers deftly pirouette around them….making even wider circles when they come unsteadily plodding trough with a large heavy tray in one hand and a tray jack in the other…those that witness this are oftentimes uncertain as to the fate of the tray……holding their breath until the tray is awkwardly, yet usually safely lowered to the tray jack. Whew.

I have seen trays dump over, or plates fall off, to the amusement of all that see this…(for some, it’s the most excitement they’ve had all week).. ..except for the server, who’s totally embarrassed, the cook who’s totally pissed, and has to remake the entrée, and the poor soul who now has to wait longer for their meal. Oh well, shit happens. Happy Friday!

Working with old friends.....

It’s great when you get to work with old friends, that you used to work with. It’s no fun to be the new kid on the block, and not know a sole. Like when I started my current job….. I didn’t think I knew anyone there, but t doesn’t on my second night I see an old friend I had worked with for years….we just haven’t worked in the same place for about a decade. All of a sudden your comfort zone becomes more comfortable. That, and now you kind of have an instant “in” with everyone. You know, if Bonnie says she’s okay, then she’s okay That really shortens up the getting to know everyone process. Which in restaurants is pretty quick anyway.


So now one of my friends from a different place started working here. So you get to pass the comfort thing along. It’s a pretty cool circle.

Not only that, when I’m bartending, I don’t have to break in a new server, I already know how she works, and she knows how I work.

It doesn’t matter what the job is, when you work well together, you’ll work well together anywhere.

See, there are 2 basic types of servers……the first are the one’s who are usually at the younger end of the age spectrum……they’re the one’s who are wondering what time they will get off, before they’ve even punched in. And then there’s the other type…..we’re usually a decade or 2 or 3 older then the other one’s…..a lot more experienced……we work smarter, (we have to, it’s hard to out run someone 20 years younger than you)….we enjoy the pace, the physical activity, that no two days are the same, the company of those we work with, the satisfaction of a job well done.

When you work well together, it all seems so much easier.

Activities for a really slow night......

Every now and then, you’re bound to have a really slow night. Sometimes it’s slow, (at least around here) when Mother Nature decides to unleash her fury and dump 8 inches of snow on us in a single afternoon, and travel becomes very difficult. I’m only there because I have to be there , (and it's a really short drive) but for those who have a choice and venture out, I usually amuse myself by asking them a question, “Are you out tonight because you’re really brave, or are you just an ass hole?” Believe it or not, most people respond with the latter.


Then there are those times when weather doesn’t play a factor at all, like last night. It was just painfully slow. My first chosen activity was to polish all the wine glasses, there are about 70 of them, so that killed a small chunk of time. As you stand there and admire your handiwork….you know, looking at all the sparkling glasses as the light glistens off of them, looking at them from different angles to see different patterns of light….(I told you it was sloooooow) .and then your reverie is broken when one of the servers wants to actually use one of the glasses. Okay, now you find yourself getting irritated about the glass usage, the same as if you had just washed the kitchen floor and someone walked through with muddy shoes. Time to move on…..

My next chosen activity was stapler rehabilitation. Some staples had gotten jammed in it, a customer decided to try and fix it a couple of days ago, but just made the situation worse. After carefully studying the aforementioned stapler, I decided I could fix it if I could find a really small screwdriver. The only screwdriver I could find, wasn’t small enough, so that was a short lived activity. (Although I did try using a corkscrew and a fork before totally giving up.)

Then I said to hell with it, and decided to eat. After all, it was all-you-can-eat spaghetti night. This could last for a while.

  

Mixing drinks is a lot like cooking.....

I’m glad they didn’t have all these wonderful flavors of alcohol back when I became legal. Some of this stuff is dangerous! Way back when, if we wanted something that tasted like candy, we drank peppermint Schnapps. We always knew how strong a drink was by how hard it made us gag. But we were real troopers, we persevered and choked it all down. Of course, sometimes it came back up.


But now…….there are so many flavors, you can make a million drinks that don’t taste like alcohol! So here’s where the similarity to cooking comes in…. Cooks are always substituting ingredients. So why not bartenders? The other night someone ordered a Lemon Drop. Didn’t know what went in it, so I selected a couple of lemony liquids, poured them in a glass, and…….they liked it! Back in the day, when someone ordered a Planter’s Punch or a Mai Tai, I’d pour some rum in a glass, add fruit juices, a little grenadine for color, and voila! A tropical drink. And yes, it was the same recipe for all of those.)

The other day I went off on a chocolate tangent. I created my own liquid box of chocolates. I made a chocolate orange cream, always one of my own personal favorites. And a chocolate covered hazelnut, a chocolate raspberry cream, and a heavenly milk chocolate delight. Some of this stuff is dangerous!

So if you order some weird drink from me……it may not be exactly the one you had somewhere else…..but it’ll taste good!

When customers are part of the well-oiled machine.....

In the last two decades of the previous millennium, (wow, that was a long time ago) the 80’s and 90’s, to be precise, the Metro Detroit area was in full swing. The auto plants, several of which were within a couple of miles of where I was working as a bartender, were humming right along. Every weekend there was a line of people at the door waiting for tables and the bar was standing room only. In order to keep the well-oiled machine running smoothly, you have to incorporate the customers into the routine.

Certain customers were assigned, or just naturally fell into certain tasks, which they performed admirably during their weekly visits.

When Nancy’s husband was ready for his after dinner coffee, she would go and get it herself, and also bring one for me, complete with sugar and properly stirred.

Geri was in charge of place mats and silverware, when those around her were ready to eat. If I was too busy to give her a stack of place mats and a handful of silverware, she would just go and get them herself.

Back in the 80’s, when I still smoked, certain people were assigned to light me a cigarette and set it in the ash tray, so I could grab in on the fly as I was running by.

Another was in charge of popcorn. She would see who wanted popcorn, and happily scurry over to the popcorn machine and start filling bowls and passing it out to everyone.

Pretty much everyone was in charge of writing out their own dinner order on a bevnap and handing it to me. And yes, spelling counted. (Hey! I was a very busy bartender and didn’t want to leave anyone out.)

The old television show “Cheers”, (like we mentioned last week)……well…..we were living it, and we were loving it.

"Where everybody knows your name".......

Yes, I stole that line from the theme song of the old television show “Cheers.” But while that show was airing, I was living it, and it’s true. When working the bar you will always have old friends who come to see you, new friends who happen to wander in, but then goal is to get to a point where everyone becomes friends. Everyone wants to go someplace comfortable, where they will run into some people they can converse with or just sit back and relax, if they so choose.


Last night some old friends came in, a couple I have known for 20 years. A few seats down was a guy who has started coming in for dinner once a week, a new friend. Now, you don’t want anyone to feel like an island, like they’re watching the conversation, you want them to be a part of the conversation. People by nature are mostly sociable creatures or they wouldn’t be out in public in the first place. So it’s your job as the bartender to find a common thread, so your old friends and new friends can chat, and when you’re busy, you don’t have to be involved. Sure, the old friends came to see you, but you have other duties to attend to…so here’s an example of how to keep the conversation going, even when you’re not a part of it……

“Oh, by the way, Bob and Kathy, this is Ernie. Ernie’s usually here once a week for dinner, except for last week when he was fishing in Montana.”

That one statement opens the door for a lot of questions, some of which you may need to ask yourself, to get the ball rolling. “Where in Montana?” “What were you fishing for?” “What was the weather like?” Sooner or later, someone will have a comment to add….”I have a friend who goes fishing in Montana.” “I’ve never been to Montana, what’s it like?”

It could be anything…..somehow this conversation ended up being about going to high school in Detroit. Don’t know how it got there, but that doesn’t matter. All you have to do is throw some sparks out there and watch for the fire to start. If the first spark doesn’t catch, try another one.

Sooner or later, you will have built a social network, people will show up more often, because people want to go where everybody knows their name.