Stupid Questions.....

A woman took a sip of her water the other day, and asked me if it was well water. In some areas this would be a reasonable question…..around here, it’s just stupid. No one has well water around here. No one! Was I supposed to be impressed with her discerning palate? (Actually we were all staring at her beehive hairdo, and wondering how she could even get in her car) It was also very apparent that woman had not only never missed a meal, but probably had quite a few extra meals over the years, on a daily basis.  (I'm not buying the discerning palate thing) So I got her a new glass of water, with lemon, no less…..and this one was much better. Go figure. Then she was looking at two items on the menu, having a hard time deciding, and asked me if the spinach that came on the Portobello sandwich was cooked or raw. I told her it was cooked, but she could have it raw if she wanted to. “Oh, it doesn’t matter, I just wanted to know.” Uh-huh.


Her friend wanted some hot tea. “What kinds of tea do you have?” “I’ll bring you out the tea box.” “Oh, okay, what kinds of tea do you have?” I’ll bring you out the tea box.” “Oh, what kinds of tea are in it?” Did my eyes just roll so far back in my head you could only see the whites?

A guy at the bar wants to buy a shot of tequila for him and his friend. He orders Cuervo….I tell him the Cuervo is empty, but I will run downstairs and get another bottle. So he says, “Just substitute Patron, instead, for the same price.” “I’ll run down and get a bottle of Cuervo.” “Just substitute Patron, instead.” “I’ll run down and get a bottle of Cuervo.” “Just substitute Patron, instead.” “I’ll run down and get a bottle of Cuervo.”

So then he asks me how long this is gonna go on. “As long as you keep on saying that, but I AM going to run down and get a bottle of Cuervo.

This is the same guy who ordered the cheapest Orange Vodka we had, mixed with soda, in a TALL glass. The next drink he orders, he requests less soda. Really guy, I’m not going to replace the “less soda” with more vodka. Why did you order it in a tall glass, if you wanted less soda?