So you think you're a big shot......

Okay….so you walk in the restaurant like you own it. You don’t. You have an air about you like you’re some kind of big shot…..(all four of you)….you’re not. You expect any server who walks by to jump at the sound of your voice. Not gonna happen. See, we’ve seen you before, and we are not impressed. If you wanna be a big shooter….you’ve got to do it all the way.

As you all sit there full of self-importance, barking orders, we are doing everything we can to avoid you. This is the lunch hour, when you swagger through the door, life around you does not stop. Yesterday we were very busy…..you’re not gonna get special treatment…you’re no more special than anyone else….actually in our eyes, you’re a waste of time. When I came to take your order, you again barked that you wanted soup. Okay, what’s the rest of your order? “I don’t know, I haven’t looked at the menu yet.”

Like I said, we were very busy, I’m not gonna make 300 hundred trips back to your table. I see no reason why you can’t order like everyone else. You tell me what you want, I ask if you want soup or salad, I get said soup or salad and send your order to the kitchen. Simple. I’m too busy for you to turn this into a convoluted mess. So I tell you I’m gonna do a couple of things, give you time to look at the menu, and then I’ll get your entire order. So what do these guys do? Stop another server and tell them I said I didn’t have time to wait on you. If you’re gonna quote me, you’d better get it right, if you start putting words in my mouth, I’ll find a way to make you eat those words along with your lunch.

So like I said in the first paragraph, if you wanna be a big shooter, you’ve got to do it all the way. A 10% tip every time you are there, is NOT adequate. Even little old ladies in red hats with fixed incomes tip better than you!

I guess in one way you’ve attained your goal…..every server knows exactly who you are…..and not in a good way, not as the self-perceived big shots you see in the mirror. No, we see you as the cheap ass holes you really are.