That phrase applies to so many things…so let’s apply it to working in the restaurant industry…..
I’ll start with yesterday as an example….business generally slows down in the summertime, and sometimes it would seem as though it has come to a screeching halt. So how do you pass the time when you have three hours to kill, and nothing to do……ya gotta remember, at $2.65 an hour, there’s not a lot of motivation to start any major renovations, or even anything beyond light cleaning. I try to find something that will keep me amused for a short time, until I get bored with what I’m doing and look for another project.
I decided to dust the pictures. There are about twenty photographs handing throughout the dining room, so I dusted the top of the frame and the part at the bottom of the picture…..I stretched it out to about seven minutes…what to do with the next three hours….
I then found some stainless steel cleaner, and embarked upon my mission to polish whatever I decided need to be polished……I got lost in my reverie of making things shiny for about 45 minutes. Then I got bored with that. The non-existent customers continued to be just that, non-existent.
After all that hard work, I took a break and had some soup. Then I refilled my iced tea, (which one can turn in to a project, if one so desires, making sure to get the perfect amount of lemon and sugar) Perhaps a salad for the next course.
Oh look! Maybe I can rearrange those tea pots…and then again maybe not…..
Maybe I can roll some more silverware….don’t feel like doing that anymore, already went overkill on it, won’t need more of that until tomorrow night…….maybe I can dissect a piece of bread and experiment with the different salad dressings as bread dips……
Okay….the famine shift is over with…tomorrow we will be serving lunch to 55 people who all want to eat at the same time…..that’ll be a fun feast……
Friday, July 30, 2010
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Tools of the trade.........
As with most occupations, servers and bartenders also have their tools of the trade….
Who would ever think that a pen was a hot commodity, until you are trying to take an order at a table, and you realize you don’t have one. And what happened to said pen? Well, there were two, but both were left at the last table so they could sign their charge slips. So you excuse yourself for a moment…..run over to the table where the guest check books are sitting…..open them up…only to discover that these particular customers had somehow come to the conclusion that the pens were souvenirs, and took them.
This is why I have 5 or 6 pens clipped to my pocket. I can’t tell you how many idiots think it’s terribly clever when they ask “Have you got enough pens?”
What’s even more irritating, is when they not only take your pen, but also forget to sign the charge slip.
Another important tool of the trade (depending on where you work) is a wine key.
However, not all servers deem it necessary to carry one…after all, they can just borrow someone else’s wine key. Shortly after I loaned my wine key out a few times…..I discovered it was gone, when I needed to use it. The person to whom I had loaned it to had forgotten to give it back, and I had forgotten to whom I had loaned it to. After losing a couple of wine keys, I hit upon a solution…….collateral……if you want to borrow my wine key, you have to give me something for collateral.. Then I decided that the only things I could accept as collateral were things that would be missed before the borrower left the building. So standard procedure for loaning out my wine key is now to approach me with either your cell phone or your car keys to hand over to me for the duration of the time the wine key will be in your possession, or you ain’t gettin’ my wine key……
Who would ever think that a pen was a hot commodity, until you are trying to take an order at a table, and you realize you don’t have one. And what happened to said pen? Well, there were two, but both were left at the last table so they could sign their charge slips. So you excuse yourself for a moment…..run over to the table where the guest check books are sitting…..open them up…only to discover that these particular customers had somehow come to the conclusion that the pens were souvenirs, and took them.
This is why I have 5 or 6 pens clipped to my pocket. I can’t tell you how many idiots think it’s terribly clever when they ask “Have you got enough pens?”
What’s even more irritating, is when they not only take your pen, but also forget to sign the charge slip.
Another important tool of the trade (depending on where you work) is a wine key.
However, not all servers deem it necessary to carry one…after all, they can just borrow someone else’s wine key. Shortly after I loaned my wine key out a few times…..I discovered it was gone, when I needed to use it. The person to whom I had loaned it to had forgotten to give it back, and I had forgotten to whom I had loaned it to. After losing a couple of wine keys, I hit upon a solution…….collateral……if you want to borrow my wine key, you have to give me something for collateral.. Then I decided that the only things I could accept as collateral were things that would be missed before the borrower left the building. So standard procedure for loaning out my wine key is now to approach me with either your cell phone or your car keys to hand over to me for the duration of the time the wine key will be in your possession, or you ain’t gettin’ my wine key……
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Servers as salespeople……………………
To some extent, we, as servers are all salespeople…….our products are food and drink. We want you to buy wine, cocktails, appetizers, of course your entrees, and follow all that with dessert. I’m going to recommend the items that I like, after all, why would I want to sell you something that tastes like crap? If the chili is a little too thin, or the split pea soup is a little too thick tonight, I’m gonna let you know. However, if you work in a corporate restaurant, they will tell you what they want you to sell, such as a specific wine, because they will not be carrying it anymore, and they want to get rid of it.
There are times when a server will be all excited about a table ordering a $50.00 bottle of wine…..and exclaim to the others, “I just sold a $50.00 bottle of wine!”
“Great! Did you really sell it, or did the table simply order it?”
“They ordered it.”
It’s all good……just getting down to the facts….either way…your bill just got increased by $50.00.
I’m all about selling the food and drink, but corporate has to push it further….they want you to get your customers to go home, hop on their computer, and send in an evaluation, that they call a performance scope.
I don’t know about you, but when I go out to eat, my dining experience pretty much ends when I walk out the door. I really don’t want to be asked to go home and do what would seem like the equivalent of homework, especially when you are told to answer all the questions with the highest mark possible, or it doesn’t count. How ignorant is that? I think the biggest comment I can make, is to return to the restaurant for another meal. Or not.
There are times when a server will be all excited about a table ordering a $50.00 bottle of wine…..and exclaim to the others, “I just sold a $50.00 bottle of wine!”
“Great! Did you really sell it, or did the table simply order it?”
“They ordered it.”
It’s all good……just getting down to the facts….either way…your bill just got increased by $50.00.
I’m all about selling the food and drink, but corporate has to push it further….they want you to get your customers to go home, hop on their computer, and send in an evaluation, that they call a performance scope.
I don’t know about you, but when I go out to eat, my dining experience pretty much ends when I walk out the door. I really don’t want to be asked to go home and do what would seem like the equivalent of homework, especially when you are told to answer all the questions with the highest mark possible, or it doesn’t count. How ignorant is that? I think the biggest comment I can make, is to return to the restaurant for another meal. Or not.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Behind the scenes.................
A lot of what goes on behind the scenes, the customer never sees. Let me explain why things may sometimes take a little longer than the diner thinks they should. Let’s start with salads…..so, the server goes back into the kitchen to make four salads, the salad station is set up to accommodate two people at a time, however there are four of you all trying to make salads a quickly as possible….all reaching with octopus arms around each other for tomatoes, croutons, dressing, etc. Then as you approach the bread area, you are two steps behind the server who just emptied out the bread drawer…..when you deliver the salads, you explain that bread is in the oven and will be out in about 2 to 3 minutes. For those who believe that bread is a birthright, this 2 to 3 minutes will be an eternity.
“How could you run out of bread?!?
“We’re not out of bread….it is simply being baked as we speak.”
“Why don’t you just bake enough to last the night, that way we wouldn’t have to wait!?!”
“If we did that the bread would be cold and stale, and you would complain and send it back. Then we would have to bake more, and you would be waiting the same 2 to 3 minutes for fresh bread..”
By the time you got the salads set on the table and had the aforementioned idiotic conversation, you realize that the bread is probably done. We generally wait until our back is to the table before we roll our eyes back in our head. (These people don't realize that I aready went through salad hell for them...risking having my eye put out by and errant onion.)
Another thing the customer never sees or hears…..is, when we go back for the damn bread…..we tell whoever is back there about the anal retentive bread fools at table number whatever.
“How could you run out of bread?!?
“We’re not out of bread….it is simply being baked as we speak.”
“Why don’t you just bake enough to last the night, that way we wouldn’t have to wait!?!”
“If we did that the bread would be cold and stale, and you would complain and send it back. Then we would have to bake more, and you would be waiting the same 2 to 3 minutes for fresh bread..”
By the time you got the salads set on the table and had the aforementioned idiotic conversation, you realize that the bread is probably done. We generally wait until our back is to the table before we roll our eyes back in our head. (These people don't realize that I aready went through salad hell for them...risking having my eye put out by and errant onion.)
Another thing the customer never sees or hears…..is, when we go back for the damn bread…..we tell whoever is back there about the anal retentive bread fools at table number whatever.
Monday, July 26, 2010
There are times when things go wrong……..
and you have absolutely no control over them, such as how much rain we receive in any given season, and how many people show up for a funeral luncheon.
The boss called me one morning and asked if I could come in and work a funeral luncheon…seems the number of people jumped from 15 to 35, and they had to call in back up. Okay…I can work this…..a little background…this restaurant is a very old building, and has banquet rooms of various sizes…..so when I arrive to work, the room for this luncheon needs to be set…..first we get out the chafing dishes…get the water in them…now we have to work on getting the tables set….instead of wasting time folding napkins….I go to another banquet room that isn’t being used and steal them from there (just to economize my time, In will replace them later) then, as we are putting out the silverware and water glasses, we notice a wet tablecloth, replace it, then we notice a drip in the ceiling, and then another…it had rained a lot over the past few days…..just as people are starting to arrive, we realize we cannot use this room…too many leaks in the ceiling…so we switch them to another room…(which has tables that are already set)..and after about 5 minutes they tell us there are not enough chairs, seems the group has grown again)….so the boss decides to move them into a third room, downstairs. Yep…this is the room I took the napkins from…..there is no silverware on the tables, no water glasses in sight…it all has to be carried down the stairs (17 stairs, to be precise) along with the chafing dishes that need to be moved yet again….and they all want something to drink. AND….my partner is stuck upstairs with some truly obnoxious customers who refuse to behave like they were actually spawned on this planet……
We usually have an hour and a half to set up these banquets……so now I’m pretty much an hour and a half behind, and we have ten minutes to get their food out. So whattya do now? Run through the hallways when no one can see you, sprint up and down the stairs like you ‘re a high school athlete, (and yes, your body will make you pay for this later, in fact it’s 3 days later and I’m still feeling it) and….(this is the most important part) dazzle ‘em with your bullshit. Never let them see you sweat, even though your clothes are soaked from all the running, and your wondering if they can see the sweat forming on your forehead and running down the side of your face.......no one will notice any of that as long as they get their damn diet pepsi.
Whew!
The boss called me one morning and asked if I could come in and work a funeral luncheon…seems the number of people jumped from 15 to 35, and they had to call in back up. Okay…I can work this…..a little background…this restaurant is a very old building, and has banquet rooms of various sizes…..so when I arrive to work, the room for this luncheon needs to be set…..first we get out the chafing dishes…get the water in them…now we have to work on getting the tables set….instead of wasting time folding napkins….I go to another banquet room that isn’t being used and steal them from there (just to economize my time, In will replace them later) then, as we are putting out the silverware and water glasses, we notice a wet tablecloth, replace it, then we notice a drip in the ceiling, and then another…it had rained a lot over the past few days…..just as people are starting to arrive, we realize we cannot use this room…too many leaks in the ceiling…so we switch them to another room…(which has tables that are already set)..and after about 5 minutes they tell us there are not enough chairs, seems the group has grown again)….so the boss decides to move them into a third room, downstairs. Yep…this is the room I took the napkins from…..there is no silverware on the tables, no water glasses in sight…it all has to be carried down the stairs (17 stairs, to be precise) along with the chafing dishes that need to be moved yet again….and they all want something to drink. AND….my partner is stuck upstairs with some truly obnoxious customers who refuse to behave like they were actually spawned on this planet……
We usually have an hour and a half to set up these banquets……so now I’m pretty much an hour and a half behind, and we have ten minutes to get their food out. So whattya do now? Run through the hallways when no one can see you, sprint up and down the stairs like you ‘re a high school athlete, (and yes, your body will make you pay for this later, in fact it’s 3 days later and I’m still feeling it) and….(this is the most important part) dazzle ‘em with your bullshit. Never let them see you sweat, even though your clothes are soaked from all the running, and your wondering if they can see the sweat forming on your forehead and running down the side of your face.......no one will notice any of that as long as they get their damn diet pepsi.
Whew!
Friday, July 23, 2010
The Name Game
Excerpt from the book…………….
I think it’s a rule, that if you have 3 or more people with the same name, you must find a way to differentiate between them. We had 3 “Nancy’s” at one time. Since we were always trying to find ways to tell them apart, we started calling one, “Young Nancy”, which naturally segued into calling another, “Old Nancy,” but for some reason she did not care for that name.
“Now everyone will know that I’m the oldest.”
“No they won’t. We’ll tell them it’s because you were here the longest.”
Then the third Nancy enters the conversation, “So I get to be just plain Nancy?”
“Well, Just Plain Nancy” is a lot to spit out, I point out to her.
“No,” she moans back, “Not ‘Just Plain Nancy’, just Nancy.”
So I tell her, “You’re gonna have to make up your mind. Do you wanna be called Just Nancy, or Just Plain Nancy?”
“Neither,” she answers in an exasperated tone. “Just…….Nancy.”
“Okay, I’ve got this figured out ……we have Old Nancy, Young Nancy and Just Nancy.”
“NOOOOOOOO,” two of the three Nancy’s wail.
Young Nancy is not complaining, Old Nancy now declares she wants to be “Best Nancy,” Just Nancy is still trying to figure out the last conversation, and then Young Nancy decides she wants to be “Pretty Nancy.”
Then someone pipes in with, “How about Nancy One, Nancy Two, and Nancy Three?”
“How BOOOORRRRRRRRRIIIIINNNNNNNNG!”
Besides, then they will argue about whether the designation of Nancy One is interpreted as the oldest, first or best. We could go with Short Nancy, Tall Nancy and Big Nancy, but they’ll find something derogatory in that, too.
You know, “Hey you” works for me.
You can order your copy here:
http://www.bookfinder4u.com/search_author/Gretchen_Hocking.html
I think it’s a rule, that if you have 3 or more people with the same name, you must find a way to differentiate between them. We had 3 “Nancy’s” at one time. Since we were always trying to find ways to tell them apart, we started calling one, “Young Nancy”, which naturally segued into calling another, “Old Nancy,” but for some reason she did not care for that name.
“Now everyone will know that I’m the oldest.”
“No they won’t. We’ll tell them it’s because you were here the longest.”
Then the third Nancy enters the conversation, “So I get to be just plain Nancy?”
“Well, Just Plain Nancy” is a lot to spit out, I point out to her.
“No,” she moans back, “Not ‘Just Plain Nancy’, just Nancy.”
So I tell her, “You’re gonna have to make up your mind. Do you wanna be called Just Nancy, or Just Plain Nancy?”
“Neither,” she answers in an exasperated tone. “Just…….Nancy.”
“Okay, I’ve got this figured out ……we have Old Nancy, Young Nancy and Just Nancy.”
“NOOOOOOOO,” two of the three Nancy’s wail.
Young Nancy is not complaining, Old Nancy now declares she wants to be “Best Nancy,” Just Nancy is still trying to figure out the last conversation, and then Young Nancy decides she wants to be “Pretty Nancy.”
Then someone pipes in with, “How about Nancy One, Nancy Two, and Nancy Three?”
“How BOOOORRRRRRRRRIIIIINNNNNNNNG!”
Besides, then they will argue about whether the designation of Nancy One is interpreted as the oldest, first or best. We could go with Short Nancy, Tall Nancy and Big Nancy, but they’ll find something derogatory in that, too.
You know, “Hey you” works for me.
You can order your copy here:
http://www.bookfinder4u.com/search_author/Gretchen_Hocking.html
Thursday, July 22, 2010
The extra things we do…..
There are times when things get really boring at work…..I mean there is nothing to do….there are no tables…you’ve done all the side work you can do….you’re tired of trying to look busy….and then! Alas! You notice a clogged drain at one of the side stands! Aha! A challenge! (I told you there was nothing to do) having been a homeowner, I’ve dealt with a clogged drain or two….and you learn to work with the tools at hand.
In restaurants, first you start with a straw, poke it around in the drain, see if it will do anything, if not then you find a coat hanger, straighten it out, you know the drill…..and then if that doesn’t work, you see if a soda gun will work reach the drain…put the end of the gun right in the drain and squirt it with soda…..hopefully this will power the drain open ….remember, it’s you against the clog, the clog cannot win…..a couple of squirts later and you hear that glug glug glug you were anxiously awaiting….Eureka! The little whirlpool is starting and the water is no longer standing still…it is flowing to it’s destination in the netherworld below the sink!
Every now and then you may suffer a casualty….like earlier today, when I managed to splash the hell out of myself, just as the boss came walking over, and as he was talking to me, I was wondering if he could the water droplets all over my glasses……
I was happy I didn’t have to resort to hunting down some baking soda and vinegar. People always get nosey and ask you what you are doing when they see you carrying these things through the restaurant.
In restaurants, first you start with a straw, poke it around in the drain, see if it will do anything, if not then you find a coat hanger, straighten it out, you know the drill…..and then if that doesn’t work, you see if a soda gun will work reach the drain…put the end of the gun right in the drain and squirt it with soda…..hopefully this will power the drain open ….remember, it’s you against the clog, the clog cannot win…..a couple of squirts later and you hear that glug glug glug you were anxiously awaiting….Eureka! The little whirlpool is starting and the water is no longer standing still…it is flowing to it’s destination in the netherworld below the sink!
Every now and then you may suffer a casualty….like earlier today, when I managed to splash the hell out of myself, just as the boss came walking over, and as he was talking to me, I was wondering if he could the water droplets all over my glasses……
I was happy I didn’t have to resort to hunting down some baking soda and vinegar. People always get nosey and ask you what you are doing when they see you carrying these things through the restaurant.
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